How long can I stand?

Juz discovered that many things i cant do...
Now life being controlled...
what more can i do??
What is there to be done?
Is death or not. Thats it...
Support?
...
Trying to keep so many words
Dont dare to say
Saying things hurt in various ways
Why am i doing this to make myself so miserable?
Its juz....
sigh.... forget it...
nothing better to do

Questioning myself everyday...

Why am I like this?
Why cant i be like the others?
Why people can show interest in study but i cant?
I always wanted to study, but always fail?
Why is my life so miserable?
Am I born to have such a tough life?
Why is the thing i do never seem to have anything to do with my future?
Why do things turn out bad?
Why do i feel like dying everytime i think of this?
Why can't anybody understand how i feel or how i think? even my parents....
I know i'm dam dam dam dam complicated..

During my high school time, I used to love my life love having fun and all kind of crazy stuff i could possibly think of.
hanging out with fren through the night
Doing homework happily, get scolding by teachers, breaking small school rules
all those things lead me to a very happy life
I love my life.
but now?
I'm 18 this year... everything works like an adult.
In order to get something, i have to work for it
yea... its fair
but work load are really overloading me...
Now i question myself alot...
What is the purpose of me living in this world?
dreaming big? thinking of luxurious life? Thinking of things that is almost impossible to be done?
There are juz too many question that i cant answer...
The answers are easily answer by people, its as simple as " juz do it"
But I still cant do it.... am i juz another lousy fella living in this world working so hard for something he wan but can never be achieve?

College life is fun.... but the workload are also crazily high
I still love to be in my high school... but i know that its not possible.
the only thing i can do is to look forward and continue living this life...."so called life"
In this world now, nothing can make me feel happy....
but there is only one that shows me love and care
its my baby girl. Libby lee mun yi.
I must thank this girl for supporting me all the way...
My questions are still hanging within me.
I hope there are people who been through this before and could tell me what to do....

My LAN Project

Sorry, dunno how to post the video><
I'll juz put the links here
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pg7mkK5Qs2c

Sports day

Few more days to sports day!
Wow! i'm so exicited
Guess what?!
I'm going~
hahahahahahahahahaha
welll it might be a little later.. sigh><
Its the same day i collecting my report card from college
well its not really a happy thing to say
but sports day is~
That is why~~~
Well i'm already making plans about sports day~
well i know i dun have to buttttttttttttttt
I'm toooooooooooooooooo exicited!!!
This is crazy!!! woohooooooo
I wish red house members good luck!
be good~~~ you too love~
Love you as always
never want to stop><
I love you~~
chao

My Birthday

Its my birthday dear~~
My birthday present from you is the best~~
No need an object as a bday present
You are my best birthday present
I thank you for being my girlfren~
I appreciate the face that you are mine~
And accepted me into your life
Thanks baby~

These are some of the pix

Rocking Hour!

Hmm...
This 2 days you went to a leadership camp organize by your school
Frankly speaking,
I'm dam bored
but since it will help you improve who you are and is for a brighter and a better future,
I don't mind=)
Well, I've been to many of these kind of camp before,
It'll be fun for you=]
Hmmm, My turn!
Now, now
How do i kill my time?
HAhahahahaha
I maximize my subwoofer, DAM LOUD BOY!!
WAHAHA
Thats nice!
Bursting out the house!( lucky parents not at home)
Wish you were here and rock and roll with me
Lets ROCK THE HOUSE!!
WAHAHAHA
Check yes Juliet!
Gotta be somebody
hmmm,,
This song you dedicate to me
Take a guess?
hehe
Oh ya,
The 1st song that we both liked..
That song really bring back alot of heart pinching =)
memories~

I guess thats about it.
Love you~ My dear